Walk on Water

       Ok, I know I still have to do my "fearless" post and it's coming, but I was doing my Jesus Calling devo and it really hit me, so I wanted to share what I learned.  If you are reading this and have Jesus Calling from a previous year, or you're doing it right now, check it out- if you don't have it still check it out and feel free to comment on your thoughts =)

       So January 21st was talking about dependency on God. It gave an awesome analogy that I hadn't thought of yet.
       Jesus Calling said, " Depending only on Me, may feel like walking on a tightrope, but there is a safety net underneath: the everlasting arms. So don't be afraid of falling. Instead, look ahead to Me, I am always before you, beckoning you on- one step at a time."
      This hit me hard, because I want to be fully dependent on God, but I'm always afraid of falling, making a mistake, etc. When in reality it's worse to just sit still and take itty bitty "baby steps" - What About Bob? reference, than going for something and trusting that God will provide an take care of you.
There's been a ministry opportunity that I've been thinking and praying about for some time now, and this last week I took the next step and made some contacts. The conversations went really well and I got the go-ahead- if this is what I feel God is calling me to do. Now that's what I always get hung up on.  If you talk to my family and a number of my closest friends from this last year, they know that I've been thinking and praying about this. Before I sent the e-mails to different contacts I said, "God this is in Your hands."  I'm very passionate about starting this ministry in this location and feel at this point, if I didn't do it, or tried to do it somewhere else, I'd be wanting to do it at this spot type things. There are many things that lead me to believe that God is calling me to this, but I'm the queen of doubt and second-guessing. My father has also told me, sometimes it's not a matter of specifics, but is what you want to do going to bring glory to God and line up with His will. If it does go for it. Also this has been on my heart for a long time, in my prayers or on my mind.
      Anyways, back to the "tightrope" analogy. I get paralyzed walking on that tightrope focusing too much on specifics and not wanting to make a mistake, afraid of failure, etc that I oftentimes just stay in the same spot, or inch along too slowly, that it's a real tricky balancing act. Right now it's not a matter of making a mistake, but I'm just caught up on is this what God wants me to do or something else, but going off of what my dad has told me, it lines up. So what this devo was teaching me is not to have a faith where I inch along slowly, but sprint to Jesus at the other side, as long as I keep my focus on Him. I was just thinking about how freeing it could be to just let go of the fear and run to the Lord, and even if I trip or fall along the way, He's got me in His hands. It reminded me of the guy who crossed the Grand Canyon on a tightrope recently. If you watch the video of the end, he's running to the end. This is different, because you wouldn't actually really run on a tightrope, and he didn't have a safety net, but it's awesome to see his faith, and how he goes fast at the end when he knows it's safe. Check it out:

         I was looking on Instagram recently and I follow Bob Goff. I love reading his inspiring pictures, and there was one that really stuck out to me. I tried to just get the picture and it wouldn't let me so here's the link =) http://instagram.com/p/x2RvtXuYnV/?modal=true If you don't want to look at the picture, it said, "I'd rather have a couple ideas fail, than a faith that won't try." It made me take a step back and think about my faith. Yes, I have a faith, I believe in God, I've seen miracles happen, then why am I so afraid that an idea of mine will fail, when it may not. Who am I to say it's not God who gave me these ideas, I need to have faith and trust in God with ideas. Instead of doubting out of fear, I need to trust, and see what God will do.
        The devo I've been referring to, and this situation made me think about Peter walking on water as well. This event takes place in Matthew 14: 22-33. I've always loved this story. For one it's so amazing to read about the phenomenon of walking on water, what a miracle (yes, I know ice is frozen water, but that's not what they're talking about in Matthew). But it also shows us how easy it is to get distracted or afraid and look away. Peter takes his eyes off Jesus and looks at the waves and water around him, in that instant he falls into doubt, which causes him to fall, when he was just a part of an amazing miracle. How often does this happen to you and me? We see God work miracles in our lives and others, and then for some reason or another we have our doubts. We look away, get influenced by the world, think "that's impossible", or "how could it work?" or "I'm not good enough for that?", "I'm too shy." or a number of different things, that we start sinking instead of trusting in the One who has us. I want to be the Peter who walks on water, not the one who starts to fall. The part I haven't mentioned yet, is even though he looked away verse 31 says, "Jesus didn't hesitate. He reached down and grabbed his hand. (The Message)" Jesus is right there taking care of us, even when we have our doubts and stumble. He cares so much about us and is right there for us. Deuteronomy 33:27 says, "The eternal God is your dwelling place, and underneath are the everlasting arms. And he thrust out the enemy before you said, 'Destroy'."  God's everlasting arms are there for us, He loves us and wants us to fully trust Him.
       Which brings me to my closing. Earlier this year Family Force 5 came out with a new album and on it is a track titled, "Walk on Water." The part that has rung out to me every single time I've listened to the song, like God is trying to speak to me is, "'Cause I let my fear, let my fear, get in front of my faith" - because I feel that is very prevalent to me. Fear is something I struggle with, and I don't want to be afraid, and just trust in the Lord. I love the chorus too, many times this has become a little of an anthem and prayer when I listen to the song. Check it out below:

Let's be the kind of Peter with the faith that walks on water,
               Love,
                    Jalynn (Jessica Lynn)